There are so many trivial things in life to be frustrated about that it’s a wonder it isn’t our main emotion. It’s possible everyone else just has more patience and understanding than me, but I doubt it much. Like on Monday for instance, I was frustrated about horrific train services, rain, the economy (hello I’m an adult), the tape over mini egg tube lids and 4G not working properly. Apart from like how hard this country makes it for young people to be financially stable, the rest is just a big pile of whatever.
I should probably try and be less frustrated about unimportant things, but I’ve tried really hard and I can’t help it. There’s one thing that makes my frustration pretty much boil up and explode and will probably be the cause of the many frown lines I’m working on daily- explaining a health condition to people repeatedly. So new people yeah, you meet them and they know naff all about you, so I can appreciate they might need a little filling in, but it’s when you’ve already laid it out several times, in many different circumstances that I just get a bit blurry eyed and angry.
It’s not just having a chronic painful condition like me, there’s loads of similar inflictions that mean people are limited and not ready to take on the world on a daily basis. I know plenty of people who suffer with anxiety, bad backs, endometriosis, IBS- they’re all limited because of it in one way or another and while most of them wouldn’t go on about it, it’s helpful to have people that remember. I’ve discussed this exact thing with two friends in particular who get the same problem- people think they’re flakey or boring or ‘getting old’ if they turn down plans or can’t commit to things but that’s just not it.
That’s not it at all.
Health is health and it isn’t like you can wake up, sit it down and politely ask if it will behave and do you a solid.
Besides scratching it into your forehead or wearing it emblazoned on a jumper everyday there’s not much that I or anyone who feels the same can do. I don’t want to talk about health woes or bring them up but having a long term condition does get in the way at times. It does ruin plans. It ruins fun. It doesn’t want you to go out and dance and eat 2am McDonalds and some days it doesn’t want you to go to work or get out of bed.
I know the frustration when someone who you’ve explained your problem to time and time again doesn’t get you. Or asks why when you feel like it’s obvious. Or tries to talk you into like it’s just a ‘too tired’ thing. It’s hard and tiring but chances are it won’t get much better so you’re doing a good job at putting up with it. I feel you. I feel you a million times over. Chances are people don’t mean it. They don’t want to make you feel angry or misunderstood.
It might just be something to try and make peace with. It might be something that causes you to rage. Or comfort eat sometimes. Or feel like hitting your head off the wall. But you’re pretty much a hero. ❤