20 things that happened on nights out in Kingston Oceana


 1) Keeping an eye on the view from Spoons and deciding whether or not there was time for one more jug of Cheeky V.

2) Feeling like you were at the airport when queueing up, getting searched, showing ID, checking in coats and going immediately to the toilet.

3) Realising the night was probably over when slumped in arm chair in the ‘ski lodge’, wondering why they ever decided to go with an Alpine theme.

4) The weird room when you first enter that you have to walk through, full of people dancing VERY seriously to R&B and wearing a lot of denim.

5) Losing a member of the group between rooms, never seeing them again.

6) Finding out the mythical hot dog stand was open. Immediate euphoria.

7) Having a breather and a nice Pineapple VK in the weird, quiet marble room full of statues and leather armchairs.

8) Going to the ‘upper deck’ of the ballroom for a birds eye view of activities and to scout out all the bodycon and possibly that friend you lost three hours ago.

9) Losing hours of your life dancing to 5ive and B*witched in the cheese room and slipping over 7 or 8 times on the disco tiles.

10) Sticking to the carpet. A lot.

11) Stopping to wonder who decided to put dark red velvet curtains up on a wall for no reason at all.

12) Getting caught up in massive hype when there was a ‘musical guest’, cramming into the mass ballroom crowd for hours to be near the front, then getting 10 minutes of bad miming but loving it anyway.

13) The time of night where everyone gathered for 10 minutes of indie music, ending with a screaming rendition of Sex On Fire.

14) Being full of dread whenever the queue backed up all the way to Wilkinsons.

15) Watching girls put out their best moves on the wooden podiums.

16) Cheering to every single birthday announcement made by the unknown invisible DJ.

17) Trying to do a headcount in one of 4847373 corridors, getting immediately moved on by bouncers, losing more people.

18) Leaving at the end of the night and sitting on the long wall outside watching various people vomit/be tended to by emergency services.

19) Obligatory photos of the whole group climbing on those telephone boxes high on VK sugar.

20) The weird, pointless VIP rooms that people somehow got wrist bands for but no one ever found out how.





6 thoughts on “20 things that happened on nights out in Kingston Oceana

  1. Oh gosh, this brings back so many memories! We went a couple of times at Uni because it was one of the biggest clubs near us and this is pretty much an accurate representation – constantly losing people and sticking to the floors!


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