Girls, why do we forget to reward our own hard work?


I’m not one of those people that’ll get all roudy during a discussion at the pub an start listing ways in which woman are better than men and how our struggle is much more real because periods and birth and cystitis. I have as much respect for men as I do for my fellow girls. I live with a man, have a lot of man friends who I love very much, have a great dad, work with a delightful bunch of men. You catch my drift.

But I am, at the end of the day (and at the start of the day actually) a woman. I have a V not a P, so yeah, gonna write about women.

I went to the doctors on Monday about a chronic condition I have, just a sort of check in, and she asked me why I had my jaw clenched. I wasn’t aware I did. She then asked me about stress and life and how I was feeling, and though I went in feeling alright, I suddenly, when put on the spot, got a bit overwhelmed by various feelings and worries and stresses and how tired I was, just to top things off. Nothing like some exhaustion to really brighten up your day.

She told me to try really hard to de-stress, (I have had a stressful 12 months, for many other reasons than life in general) and basically sent me away with my usual bloods to get done and an order to chill out. But it’s HARD. It’s really hard and we definitely do not give ourselves credit where it’s due.

I imagine my list of girl things that prove stressful and a drag at times wouldn’t be much different to most others. Periods, cystitis, the cost of a good bra, fear of giving birth (I haven’t quite got there yet, so I just sit and wonder), annoyance over the fact there’s still inequality in the workplace. That’s a few off the top of my head. I could, if I had the time, really get into but I don’t, thankfully.

Ultimately, there’s not a great deal we can do about these things. They are mostly all a part of life we accept and get on with (obvs not inequality, nuh uh), because what else can we do? I’m not looking for sympathy or anyone to jump up and say ‘YEAH SOLIDARITY SISTER’. I’m really, really not. I just think it doesn’t hurt from time to time to remember that us girls deserve to pat ourselves on the back sometimes. I sometimes get home from work on a day where I’ve had bad stomach cramps and needed endless painkillers to stay sitting upright and think, yeah, probably going to treat myself to a vat of chocolate tonight. Damn right! I also think it’s nice to remember that your girl friends might need a bit of encouragement from time to time. A good friend of mine recently told me to give myself a break because ‘you can’t feel pleased about achievements and pizza when you’re dead.’

I mean, sound advice right there.

There’s nothing wrong with self-rewarding and nothing wrong with recognising that we do a good job of cruising through the river of crap that can be life sometimes.

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